Notes from a climate protest

Gretas The protest Coralines are looking enviously at the blonde-haired Scandinavian Gretas in the hiked up school uniforms that keep getting all the attention from TV crews wanting to film them as they walk in a straight line with flowers in their hair arm-in-arm singing ‘save the world’ Manson Family style. One of them wants…

Open Day – electric cars and marbled beef

It’s Open Day so we start at Monash even though I went to Melbourne but I want my children to understand life’s superficial ground rules and the Clayton campus with its international research reputation, masters courses on how to use a hyperlink effectively and elevated freeway overpasses is a good place to start.  Life isn’t just about…

More stuff banned by edgy culture crowd

Last week, a show was pulled from the forthcoming Melbourne Fringe Festival after a backlash and accusations of racism. The show, by Kate Hanley Corley, was called Aisha the Aussie Geisha. It was billed as ‘a cross-cultural love story’ about a ‘dairy farmer who becomes the world’s first foreign geisha’. In the show, Corley appears in geisha garb….

Corporate thought leader

As a business leader it is important to do the hard yards so that you can get up at your TED talk and say that you have done the hard yards. Personally I recommend war zones. Like many of you I say on my LinkedIn that I served as a senior corporate adviser in Iraq…

I am woke

Legend has it that at the financial end of Collins Street where all the smart people go to beg there is a tall glass tower where stockbrokers used to hurl themselves off the roof pretending they’re Essington Lewis and shouting ‘I am work’ as they race to the concrete below. But they are all a bunch of fakes as they only do this when they are sad or disappointed in the current state of the…

Boris, Bill and Bob – the morality game

At the recent G20 one commentator was quick to criticize many of our world leaders – and one leader-in-waiting particularly –for their boorishness, narcissism and unfitness for office. Given the choices, from an anti-democracy touting Vladimir Putin to journalist-butchering Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman this was the journalistic equivalent of shooting political fish in a barrel – or a bloodied Louis Vuitton suitcase if you’re a Saudi prince. At…

Post election insomnia

I was in Sydney during the Berejiklian landside and the tyre burning that followed and I stayed in a cheap hotel with an italicized sign that read ‘love is love’ which is something Kylie Minogue said to Richard Wilkins during her 2018 boot-scooting tour. It was March and I couldn’t sleep because of the autumn heat and…

Toffee

If You’re wealthy and went to a private school Toffee is just the thing. The new Tinder-style app has been created so that like-minded private school types can hook-up with people who are exactly the same as they are. It’s like your personal Twitter echo chamber without the shouty tedium and morality or going to a private school without the inconvenient poor people except for the…

Work

It’s my first day at the job. I’m walking down Flinders Lane with its shadowy art deco buildings passing Degraves Street and dodging sleepy tour guides drinking macchiato before the first shift. I’m listening to Dylan’s Desolation Row with its Nurse Ratched riff of empty hall ways and urinating property lawyers worried about the election and…

Nazi hunting in Hawthorn

  Down here in leafy Hawthorn there are lots of Nazis. It’s where rich people go to die; dissatisfied communication specialists to sulk and unemployed journalism graduates to mow lawns. It’s a Weimar recipe for disaster with its faux jazz bars and Kurt Weil theme nights, its vast economic disparities between the rich and those…